If anyone has wondered why posts have been few and far between over the Summer, the answer lies somewhere between the zoo, the museums, the parks and the family we’ve been happily bouncing between on vacation.
But,there might have been a few other events that hindered more frequent posting. And those reasons might have centered on some domestic challenges. And, for once, I’m not talking about my dislike of laundry.
Take this, for instance.
Did you know that if you can’t find the dishwasher detergent, that dishwashing liquid is NOT a good substitute?
Or, take this example:
That would be my other sister’s oven after I turned on the self-cleaning cycle.
I didn’t clean the grates of dripped angel food cake before turning it on.
Did you know that once the self-cleaning cycle starts, that you can’t unlock the oven door?
We figured that out as the smoke billowed from the oven and we watched in horror as each of the angel food cake glops reached flash point and burst into unholy flames.
The oven had turned into an un-openable fire place.
The best part?
As we ran out of the house, I yelled, “I’ve got the kids!”
My other sister yelled, “I’ve got the dogs!”
And my other sister yelled, “I’ve got the cake!”
My middle sister had been eating leftover birthday cake modeled after a Girl Scout Samoa cookie…
The recipe is totally awesome and was quite a bit of work. I have to admit- It really would have been a shame to lose it.
Thankfully, the fire put itself out after a few minutes.
We re-entered the house once the orange glow in the oven window subsided.
But, then I was met with a new and very pressing challenge.
The velcro on our son’s capes was worn out and he was very upset about it.
So, I bought stick-on velcro.
That stuff doesn’t work.
And, I don’t sew.
So, this has been a great solution.
Fast forward to a rainy night where our daughter asked to have a “Thunderstorm Party where we make sugar cookies shaped like stars”.
We’re not at home and I had no cookie cutters.
So, we improvised.
Yes. Mom of the Year used a red solo cup to make notional “sunburst” shaped cookies with her pre-schoolers.
And, yes. They both belted Toby Keith’s “RED SOLO CUP! YOU FILL ME UP! LET’S HAVE A PARTEEE!!!!! LET’S HAVE A PARTEEE!!!!” throughout the whole process.
Remember that birthday cake my sister saved from the oven fire I started?
Here’s a pic from a few days earlier where we cut it at a Korean restaurant celebrating my dad’s birthday.
Please note the re-usable plastic containers on the table.
I grabbed those on the way out of the house to be sure we wouldn’t be eating the cake out of our hands at the restaurant. Classy!
But, guess what?
I’ve learned something recently-
My lack of domestic skills is not really my fault.
It has proven to be hereditary.
Here I am about to blow out my birthday candles in the Costco cake my parents brought over and kept in the box.
Not that I minded….It tasted just the same to me.
But, another day, I went to my parent’s house and found this- a nifty solution to channeling lamp light.
Well, I think that about sums it up.
I should probably apologize to the kids right now.
Their Papa is king of the jerry-rig and their momma has literally messed up Jell-O.
Did you know that tonic water has nasty-tasting quinine in it and is not a good substitute for sparkling water?
So, in light of recent events, here is a small note for my kids.
I love you.
Here are the things I promise to teach you in the coming years:
1) Always have dishwashing tablets on hand.
2) Pay someone to come clean your oven. Those things are dangerous.
3) While your oven is cleaning, have them do your laundry, too.
4) And the dishes.
5) There are many more uses for red solo cups than are traditionally considered.
6) The coolest thing about quinine is how it’s spelled.
7) Tape and aluminum foil can fix pretty much anything.
8) Nevermind the packaging.
9) Should you ever feel domestically disinclined, it’s not my fault.
10) It’s Papa’s fault. (Please see photographic proof above).
SO, Are YOU a Domestic Hero or Zero?Pin It