I unintentionally overheard a colleagues phone call with her son the other day and it was apparent her child was in some distress about a project at school. I don’t know exactly what happened, and it really isn’t relevant, but through this accidental awareness of a one sided conversation I learnt something very interesting about myself as a parent. I’m an angry mummy. Yes, I said it.
When I feel my child has been unfairly wronged or upset, my go to response is to fire up and get cross, huff and puff and threaten to write letters to teachers, etc. Now that may be partially just part of my personality (actually it is totally due to that), but that is how I react as I want my children to know I love them so passionately that I will protect and stand up for them, like a fierce lioness. At least that is what I tell myself; perhaps I do it for me more than I would like to admit. My colleague however, her reaction was one of gentle tones and empathy. There was no raised voice or over zealous reaction on her behalf. She listened to her child, shared his disappointment then came up with a great idea of how he could still present his mystery project.
And it made me think. If I was in distress about something, I think that is the kind of response I would like too, rather than my ‘hell hath no fury like a mummy scorned’ version. While I may be an ‘angry’ mum, I am also one who constantly tries to learn, change and evolve for the benefit of my children. So I am storing this lesson away and look forward to the next time my child is upset and in need of me, so I can try out ‘calm’ mummy (and then sedately go into my room and punch a pillow a few times).